I am so annoyed......

[precocious]

I am in the process or in the attempt of trying to change schools for my kids. The school I wish to put them into is just a 'normal' catholic school...not a 'specialty' or 'over achiever' school. It's a nice local catholic school.

Do you know that not only I, but my children needed to be interviewed. I had to get copies of all kinds of records and had to explain why my kindergartener at the time received a comment from a loony tune teacher??? So if I say the teacher is a loon, it appears that I feel my child is perfect and it's all the teacher's fault and that I am blaming others. If I say that was an adjusting kindergartener ......I have the child from Hell. Either scenerio...I lose!:doh:

Now throw in my 3yo who is climbing all over and leaning all over the nun's desk, if I take her off I know she will scream because this is her 'nap time'..and if I leave her there, jeesh, I just have no control over my kids and let them do what they want...and further top that by a 10 1/2yo who is being dramatic in tears because she wants to go to school with her friends and not here.:verysad: ...

Dare I mention my cell phone that keeps ringing???:doh:

Those were the high points of the 'interview' :doh:

Now, I will know by letter within 2 weeks if we are accepted. Accepted???? In the Catholic Church that I grew up in all sinners were not only accepted but welcomed..... Children are always loved, cherished and nurtured........not just the ones who are 'approved'.

This whole 'thing' just doesn't seem very Christian to me. :rant: And for the record....my children are not disruptive and problematic delinquents...:mmph:


..most the time anyway....:tongue:

Do I miss my old parish.....

 

[rcdldl]

And why do you want them to go to this school? And pay for it? All children are wonderfull.

 

[callmeCrazyButt]

That is a shame that they would have to be accepted into a Catholic school. Best of luck to you and your children!

 

[precocious]

Prior to our move they were in Catholic school. They are currently in public school. My oldest will be moving onto intermediate school next year and it is a very rough school, I do not want her there. I am also not totally thrilled with their current school and their 'new way' of teaching. I'd rather my children be in a more family, community and spiritual atmosphere and in a bit more 'regimented' school.

 

[precocious]

That is a shame that they would have to be accepted into a Catholic school. Best of luck to you and your children!

Thanks....they have no problem accepting our weekly donation in church...:noidea:...matter of fact last week they called our home soliciting for the 'Cardinal's Appeal'..:doh:

 

[sampler]

that does seem a bit rediculous to interview young children. its a school and this is america all children deserve an education. you would think they would happily take your money. its too bad the public schools are no good

 

[Ragnarok]

Thanks....they have no problem accepting our weekly donation in church...:noidea:...matter of fact last week they called our home soliciting for the 'Cardinal's Appeal'..:doh:

Okay honey.....now I know I may get my head bit off and tossed back to me like a Mayan basketball, but I am going to elect to answer your question and fairly. First off I am, and, will always be "Cradle Catholic" of the "Old School Tradition." Meaning, I went to twelve years of Catholic School, and, for the past nineteen years have trained and worked with a Franciscan Monastery. There are some "credentials" for my comments to follow.

Precocious, Catholic Schools have had, and, always will have HIGH STANDARDS. Period. You and your children either meet those standards, agree to meet the standards or learn to meet the standards. That is what separates our schools from public schools. What I see here it is YOU are taking the proverbial "Parental Temper Tantrum" due to your own frustration of not being in the "Control Seat." Couple that with the kids acting up, and, you forgetting to turn off the stupid cell phone, and, what you have is a scenario of "passive aggressive control" on YOUR PART. Fear not, you are not the only Catholic parent who thinks that by waving a checkbook it gains you imput, access, or an opinion! NOPE NOPE NOPE. That is the beauty of Catholic Schools...there is a hierarchy, a pecking order, and, a set of rules and regulations. You either play along, or don't even attempt to play.

It is not about whether the children are accepted, loved, and cherished. They certainly are all of those most times. There are different levels, different grading systems, and, goals that are set for children based on their intellectual capacities, and, performance abilities. You are finding that you cannot "push the Catholic School system" around, and, really you shouldn't want to.

Yes, any Catholic Church is happy to accept your donation, but, in the end, if you don't want to make one, then don't! Just by the very nature you toss in a few bucks into the basket will not gain you entrance into the "Pillars of the Church" or as a member of the "Annointed Few!" You better dam side have a check with six digits written on it for you to gain that attention!!!!! God doesn't care whether you use envelopes, toss in a fifty, or fifty cents. Trust me, God is just happy you and others, are giving Him a little of your time and prayer time. Money is not an admittance into Church, and, if any denomination demands that out of any person, you know that is not the thumbprint of God. Give what you want, when you can, for all the right reasons. Period.

In the end.......your kids were acting like little shi---heads and you got all kinds of nervous! So what, they are kids. You cannot take out their pituitary glands, you gotta love them and teach them at HOME how to act out in PUBLIC. That takes time, trial and error, pateince as a parent. and, repetition. Learn from today, and apply it to your next outing. Don't beat yourself up as a parent, but rather know that your kids (and no one elses for that matter!) come with an "Owner's Manual" or a chart of predictability! Where would the fun be in that! So take a chill pill, pour a glass of wine, and, say "F--k it, it happened, oh well, and, what God wills for my babies so be it!" In the end, Catholic, Muslim, Buddhist, Rock Worshipper.......all children are precious if we adults allow them to grow and blossom where God plants them. Say a prayer to "Saint Gerard Magella" the patron saint of Mothers and Children. Say a prayer to "Saint Thomas Aquinas and Saint Scholastica" both patron saints of students! Then, let God work in His way.....in the end, trust me, He always does anyway! My prayers will be for your family and their needs this evening. :hug:

 

[precocious]

I am not having a temper tantrum. I'm appalled at a pompous attitude at possibly not even giving my children the chance to meet or exceed their high standards.

I too have done my 'catholic stint' in education. I have relatives who are very involved in the church, my aunt is a nun and my uncle is a deacon.

I'm annoyed because I sat there as a member of this parish feeling very judged. As I said before, the catholics that I grew up with and my old parish welcomed everyone. Everyone was given the chance and opportunity.

If they cannot accept my children into their school, then I don't feel we belong in their parish either.

As for the 3yo, what 3yo would not prop themselves up on a desk that has a whole fanned out display of lollipops???

You pegged me, my kids and the situation wrong.

Parishes and schools are not run by the 'will of God' but by someone's 'version' and 'interpretation' of such and vary from parish to parish. That cannot be argued with.

 

[bluesky]

I know most private schools interview the parents, but to interview the children too is going a little far, I think- especially from one's own church. I do think this was a little much. I really can't imagine keeping control of that many children during an interview- Preco does have a lot of kids you know.

 

[Ragnarok]

Maybe, just maybe where we are differing here is the word "interview." Are you sure that they were not "EVALUATING" your children, the level of their achievement, and, the capacity for placement into the school? None of us were there to really see the scenario!! You are right, each parish differs, each diocese differs. You know the drill Preco...if the shoe doesn't fit for you and the kids, find a new shoe that is more comfortable! It is about the "fit" and happiness of all involved in the end. Yep you are right, the Catholic Church is "an institution" and is run like a corporation. Has been for centuries. No different in any other denomination either! Don't get discouraged, if they don't "accept your kids" into the program, don't sweat it, don't worry on it. Find one that will work better for you. Unlike the public school system where some kids are forced to stay in a school because of a county location, or home address, private schools are more flexible in that regard. Keep interviewing schools and don't let them intimidate you! Go in armed for bear! Have YOUR QUESTIONS arranged, YOU steer the conversation, and, YOU interview the school and its teachers. Never should any parent cave in where their kids success or happiness is concerned. Not to mention Preco, if you and your hubby are unhappy, it will filter out to the children. Could make for unrest which, is unhealthy. :wave:

 

[precocious]

My daughter is testing above grade level, and the boys both have been tested at 90% and 95% percentile and their IQ avgs are 108 and 125 (with high performance at 119 and 132 respectively). Their attendance is near perfect. There has never been any type of disciplinary issues noted within the schools (or anywhere else).

Their CCD report card/evaluations (from the same school/parish) are always glowing.

From one short 'interview' this woman can determine my children's education...:stupid:

 

[DanC]

OK, my turn to jump into the grinder

This may be God's way of telling you to homeschool your kids.

Yes, it's what we're doing
No, it's DEFINITELY not for everybody. I have recommended people stop homeschooling their kids and send them to school.
It's all about what's best for the kids.

I'm going to leave it at that.
The PM box is open if anyone wants to discuss particulars.

 

[Ragnarok]

OK, my turn to jump into the grinder

This may be God's way of telling you to homeschool your kids.

Yes, it's what we're doing
No, it's DEFINITELY not for everybody. I have recommended people stop homeschooling their kids and send them to school.
It's all about what's best for the kids.

I'm going to leave it at that.
The PM box is open if anyone wants to discuss particulars.

Good point Dan......I homeschooled my son for about two and a half years, and learned that he was truly a gifted child. He began college at age nine, graduated with his BS at age fourteen, graduate school from then on. Homeschooling is one of the most rewarding experiences I have ever had. However, we pioneered the same in the late eighties and early nineties when homeschooling had little following, no support groups, and, was frowned upon. Now, it is "cool and rebellious" to homeschool kids! The parent has to be focused, disciplined, engaged in learning, and, prayerful. It is a cooperative effort if there are two parents involved. If the parent falters, the program won't work effectively.
We used the "Calvert School System" and I supplemented with tons of extra subjects and projects. It gave my son the freedom to learn, explore and grow. From a "Catholic Perspective" it gave my then husband and I the right and control to educate our son from a spiritual perspective which we thought paramount to his develpment as a child and our strength as a family.
Agreed...it is NOT right for everyone. But certainly worth a "nod and a wink" for parents to look into it! :wave:

 

[diGriz]

I'm sorry...

Dare I mention my cell phone that keeps ringing???

Had I known you were having a meeting with Sister, I would not have tried to call you about the 'cloth tape measure' posted by jellybean.

I didn't want you to miss it.:wave:

 

[precocious]

Precocious, Catholic Schools have had, and, always will have HIGH STANDARDS. Period. You and your children either meet those standards, agree to meet the standards or learn to meet the standards. That is what separates our schools from public schools. What I see here it is YOU are taking the proverbial "Parental Temper Tantrum" due to your own frustration of not being in the "Control Seat." Couple that with the kids acting up, and, you forgetting to turn off the stupid cell phone, and, what you have is a scenario of "passive aggressive control" on YOUR PART. Fear not, you are not the only Catholic parent who thinks that by waving a checkbook it gains you imput, access, or an opinion! NOPE NOPE NOPE. That is the beauty of Catholic Schools...there is a hierarchy, a pecking order, and, a set of rules and regulations. You either play along, or don't even attempt to play.

Rags, I really take offense to this. Being annoyed at my children and being displeased with an 'interviewer' of my faith, you construe as a "Parental Temper Tantrum"? Where do you get off saying that I'm waving a checkbook to get my kids into this school?

You are really way off the mark here.

I won't know for 2 weeks whether they are 'accepted' or not. Perhaps this Nun is totally fine with the 'interview' and there is no issue? I expressed my frustration as I felt I, and my family, were being judged and the children were not putting their best foot forward, for what I know my children to be capable of.

Should it not go in my/our favor, I personally will be a bit shaken in my faith and beliefs of what I've come to know and expect from 'the church'. There will be no begging, no pleading and nor will there be any bribes or dangling of checkbooks. Nor will I walk in there and demand to 'control' the situation.

If this doesn't go in our favor, that is telling me that this parish is not for us.

What I found ironic is that they call my home, as a parishoner, to solicit donations for the Cardinal's Appeal, which they will accept, but that they might not give my children the chance to be 'accepted' into their school? They accept me and my money as a parishoner, but it's if-y if they'll educate my children? Hypocritical, no?

OK, my turn to jump into the grinder

This may be God's way of telling you to homeschool your kids.

Dan, I know my capabilities and this is not one of them I applaud your family at taking the iniciative with your children. Where I live there are much better opportunities for learning than from what I can give them.

Had I known you were having a meeting with Sister, I would not have tried to call you about the 'cloth tape measure' posted by jellybean.

I didn't want you to miss it.:wave:

diGriz, thanks for the calls, I got in on the deal when I toured the 'computer room' . Just told her I was checking for internet access :bigok: Good thing there were no man pics on the 'cloth tape measure' deal :tongue:

:hmmmm2: Then again, that may have insured our 'acceptance'.....:sus:

:yo:

 

[Ragnarok]

Rags, I really take offense to this. Being annoyed at my children and being displeased with an 'interviewer' of my faith, you construe as a "Parental Temper Tantrum"? Where do you get off saying that I'm waving a checkbook to get my kids into this school?

You are really way off the mark here.

Look Preco,
You posted a thread, and, I replied as I saw the data presented! It is not my way to be overtly critical or judgmental of anyone. However, you rubbed me the wrong way by "Catholic Bashing" the Church. Remember it is "our faith" and our objective to participate in the spirit of "ecumenism" and foster a good image about our Church! You pitching a royal "b-ch" about phone call solicitations is NOT a good way for others here on this forum to view us as parish members or a good way to present our faith. So where do you get off?!?!? Period. You ruffled my Catholic feathers and I didn't say anything on that until now. The Cardinals' appeal is a global one and has nothing to do with the school or parish in your vicinity! You are whining, you are barking, and, your toes got stepped on so you take pot shots at whatever or whoever! Can the crap Preco, and move on here. I won't stand in your line of fire and take the canon and shell that you are firing my way, or the Church's.

I am not sorry for my interpretations. You as a parent "had a horrible day out" with the kids during a very stressful and anxious time. But that happens to us all as parents, and, we learn from it and move on. I will say it again, YOU cannot and will not, be able to FORCE that School's hand, or that Church's hand. It doesn't play out that way. If the school doesn't take the children, you will grieve a bit, be annoyed lots, and, then focus and move on to the benefit of your children. I said it once (go back and read it above) if the shoe doesn't fit for you and the kids, GO FIND ONE that does. You owe it to your children to address their needs at the level the need presents itself.

Now, I offered my night prayers for your family's needs and intentions, and, I remembered them this morning at Mass. Offering my Communion for the same. I will continue to do so, with the hope that God leads you to the right decision for the kids, and, for your peace of mind. Best I can do...as a Catholic who believes the will of God is always the pathway to pray for anyone.
Rags

 

[precocious]

I was not "Catholic Bashing". If you read my post, I missed my old parish. No where did I say this reflects on every "Catholic", matter of fact I said the opposite.

No where did I say that I was forcing anyone's hand or wished to, quite the opposite.

And quoting you "That is the beauty of Catholic Schools...there is a hierarchy, a pecking order, and, a set of rules and regulations. You either play along, or don't even attempt to play."

I need to "play along"?, be a phony and deceive to be in a 'catholic school'? I find no beauty in that.

Either I fit into this parish's philosophy or not, that's the bottom line. I'm not trying to change it (force anyone's hand), I'm just taken aback by this whole event as it was unexpected with all my dealings over the years with catholic schools on many levels.

If you can't handle criticism of your 'own religion' or rather the way some parishes are conducting themselves, then I'm sure your 'feathers' must get 'ruffled' a lot.

 

[sampler]

maybe you should check back into the public schools. i think kids get the most well rounded experience there anyway. it doesnt sound like you will be happy w/the catholic school even if they are accepted (which im sure they will be)

 

[jjgailey]

Don't mean to stir things up here, but...

I don't mean to make to make anyone upset here and I considered just to PM precious, but decided to would be bold and make my statement here.

No offense to Ragarok, but Precious...I find it very hard and offensive myself, as a Christian, to take any advice at all from someone who uses the word "sh--head" in reference to the way children act or mostly offenesivly says to just blow it off saying "F--k it, it happened, oh well, and, what God wills for my babies so be it!". To me, these aren't the words of advice I'd take from a fellow believer. I guess anyone could call that judging too...but I'm really just pointing out being offended by the words that were used.

I haven't been hanging around the posts much these days, but for this to be one of the first words of advice to read, when coming back on, kind of took me as shocking, especially under the subject of Christian schools. Now, I am not Catholic nor have I even been, and I do disagree on a lot about the Catholic beliefs, but Catholic or not...I also do believe to that every parent should have a right to go to choose the school of there choosing. I'm sorry this happened to you, meeting with someone about putting your children into a "private" school should never feel like a judgement sentence. I appauld you for being a responsible parent who knows what is going on in their child's lives and wants to make a difference by taking them out of a school that you feel isn't good for them and putting them into a better one. Seems to me that by the way the people at the school act, kind of represents the way the school teaches.

I had a very positive experience going to a more a non-traditional private school and homeschooling, but that is not for everyone. Homeschooling takes ALOT of patience, either you know you can do it or you can't, it isn't for everyone. In fact, I've started preschool homeschooling and it has already been challenging.

Oh ...and trust me on the 3 yo old issue...consider feeling blessed that's all you're 3 yo did LOL...you've heard about mine!! Very normal, and anyone, with experience with children (like maybe a catholic school nun who works with children everyday) should know that!

Anyways...I'm done now...bless of luck to you with the school!

 

[Ragnarok]

In the end, we're all just "dots on the screen".....and our lives go on despite the opinions or comments of others.