question about the intentions of the online community

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clubchick

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ok, so... i realize that i'm probably very sheltered. i was (for the most part) very conservative growing up and have pretty much kept myself out of situations that would lead to me having to say NO and mean it. so, here's my question. is the online/instant messaging world similar to the real world as far as sex is concerned? it seems that at least 75% of the people i chat with end up hinting at cyber sex- or even hooking up in person. are people that promiscuous in the real world, too, or is it just because it's "safe" when you're online and not really touching? and have marriage vows become meaningless because you wouldn't believe (well you probably would!) how many people don't care whether you're married or not! when i say i don't do that online, some actually take it as a challenge. the number of people on my blocked list is minimally 10x the number on my friends list. what is up?

*note- i'm not referring to spoofee members, you all are about the nicest bunch of people i know*
well, except for dehawk :p
 
:claps:

i still think your daughter should be allowed to walk the dog with the boy next door!. If you keep her away from guys until 16 she's going to have a lot of pent up curiousity. :(

Anyway, i don't think i'm old enough to really answer this question. Being 19 i see very little point to cyber sex, but then again, i do live on a college campus so why do it online when you can have the real thing i guess.

I'm sure there are some people out there that aren't on the level, but my guess is a lot of it does have to do with the safety of being behind a keyboard, and also the fact that there is no physical interation. A lot of people have commitment/attachment/proximity issues but still have a need to fufill some kind of sexual fantasy.

I think that most people aren't that bad in real life :)
 
clubchick said:
*note- i'm not referring to spoofee members, you all are about the nicest bunch of people i know*
well, except for dehawk :p
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Yes yes cybersex is not the answer to anything. Can i have your home address now :mad:
 
bubbafett said:
You wouldn't just talk to some stranger would you? Then why chat or IM with the same company? It's asking for trouble.
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Unfortunately there are people who will talk to anyone about anything and everything. I say that if you are talking to someone and they start in on things that offend you then don't talk to them anymore. You are doing the right thing by ignoring them clubchick. :claps:
 
It all depends on who you choose to talk to though. If you go give your AIM screen name to a dating service, sex-related topics are probably the only thing you will find yourself with. However, if you choose to talk with only people you know in real life (which is much safer/better/logical), you should end up with topics that you normally talk about in a regular discussion. So, to answer your question, Yes: The Cyberworld is basically life the real world when sex is concerned. When you meet stranges, few of them will not be thinkin about it....
 
I talk to people on instant messaging clients several hours a day. I talk to lots of people, mostly ones I know, but occasionally I will talk to their roomate and kind of goof around. I can say that i've never had any sort of sexual encounter over IM. At the same time though, I've never had an overly sexual encounter in RL either. I'm 19 years old and the furthest I've ever gone with a young lady was the lips, and I don't plan on makin my way to the hips til theres a ring on the girls finger that I put there. I can't speak for other people as to if they care about the fact that you're married or not, but I have far too much respect for my wife, even though I may not know who she is just yet, to go sleeping around or pretending to do it over the internet. I also have too much respect for marriage to try and steal some other guys wife. It's not right, and I ain't gonna do it. that's all I have to say about that.
 
WadeTheWise said:
and I don't plan on makin my way to the hips til theres a ring on the girls finger that I put there. I can't speak for other people as to if they care about the fact that you're married or not, but I have far too much respect for my wife, even though I may not know who she is just yet, to go sleeping around or pretending to do it over the internet. I also have too much respect for marriage to try and steal some other guys wife. It's not right, and I ain't gonna do it. that's all I have to say about that.
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:claps:

Wow Wade! You just made up for the Uke! I have new found respect for you! I applaud your stance!

:bigok:
 
yeah, wade, that was awesome...
btw, i have 4 daughters... i might just offer you one :p

dehawk has left debuilding said:
Yes yes cybersex is not the answer to anything. Can i have your home address now
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no, but i told ya my number is 867-5309 and you can call me whenever you like ;)
 
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WadeTheWise said:
I talk to people on instant messaging clients several hours a day. I talk to lots of people, mostly ones I know, but occasionally I will talk to their roomate and kind of goof around. I can say that i've never had any sort of sexual encounter over IM. At the same time though, I've never had an overly sexual encounter in RL either. I'm 19 years old and the furthest I've ever gone with a young lady was the lips, and I don't plan on makin my way to the hips til theres a ring on the girls finger that I put there. I can't speak for other people as to if they care about the fact that you're married or not, but I have far too much respect for my wife, even though I may not know who she is just yet, to go sleeping around or pretending to do it over the internet. I also have too much respect for marriage to try and steal some other guys wife. It's not right, and I ain't gonna do it. that's all I have to say about that.
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:claps: :claps: :claps: :claps: :claps: :claps:

Well said. :D
 
WadeTheWise:
I admire your stance on sex- there’s not many people (and even fewer men) who think like you do. I wish you all the best in finding your future-wife!
And as for stealing another man’s wife, you have the right answer. I mean, enough marriages end as it is, there’s no need to add to that by trying to steal the woman away. Personally, I would wonder about the woman if she did leave her husband for the other man. If she left her husband, what’s to stop her from doing it the guy that ‘stole her away’? I’m not saying the woman is the only one in the wrong, because obviously she’s not- they both are. I just get irritated at the women, if she loved her husband enough to marry him, then there should be no chance that another guy can steal her away. I mean, if you don’t love your husband anymore, or if you’re thinking about straying- get out of the marriage, there’s no reason to cheat, it just ends up hurting everyone and there’s no reason to ever do that, especially when you’re married.
Okay- I’m finished with my spiel! :)
 
Boisegirl97 said:
I just get irritated at the women, if she loved her husband enough to marry him, then there should be no chance that another guy can steal her away.
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This reminded me of something that really bugs me. I hate it when people bad talk their spouses. I hear it all the time, "My lazy husband this" or "my lousy wife this". If people would just realize that they picked who they married in the first place, and if they were ever to talk bad about their spouse, or cheat on them, or anything else that cheapens their marriage, it's doing nothing more then telling the whole world that they chose to spend the rest of their life and more with someone they don't even like. That just sounds stupid to me. If people would just realize how lucky they are to have someone that was willing to marry them, picked them above every other person they'd ever met, and treat their spouse accordingly, we wouldn't be having this discussion.

That's not to say that marriage should be happy go lucky where everything is perfect all the time and the couple agrees on everything and they never get a little irritated at each other. That's just life. The best part is after you make it through the rough times you can look back together and say "we made it through that, now we can make it through anything. I love you honey."

Okay, i'll step off that soap box for now...
 
WadeTheWise, I COMPLETLEY agree with you!! I’ve heard so many people do this and it just irritates me, I don’t understand how anyone can do this to someone they love. I know marriage isn’t perfect, but there is no excuse for putting your partner down (especially to/in front of someone else) that shows that they have no respect for their partner or relationship. And if they keep doing that, they’ll lose both their relationship & their partner. That’s exactly what my ex did, and though it took me over a year to finally say enough, I did and now I’ve found an amazing man who has never said one thing negative to me and I appreciate him more because of my experience. A little of subject, sorry, just wanted to say (once again) you have the right idea.
 
One time my best woman friend started chatting with a guy. She told me not to be concerned because he was married, has a son & is in england. A few months later he came all the way here & asked her to marry him. She did. That says enough for me.
 
clubchick said:
no, but i told ya my number is 867-5309 and you can call me whenever you like ;)
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Hee hee hee! LOL

I think that may be before his time...

(...but I do get it!)
 
clubchick said:
no, but i told ya my number is 867-5309 and you can call me whenever you like ;)
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It's a trick, dehawk! She didn't give you the area code. :secret: Pssssssssst....... BTW, her real name isn't Jenny either. ;)

To all the lovely ladies here (doing my best Joey from Friends impression) How you doin? :tongue:
 
big daddy said:
It's a trick, dehawk! She didn't give you the area code. :secret: Pssssssssst....... BTW, her real name isn't Jenny either. ;)

To all the lovely ladies here (doing my best Joey from Friends impression) How you doin? :tongue:
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:eek: you gave up my secret :mad:
besides, i suspect dehawk isn't big on names anyway :zip:
and isn't joey from joey now? i think that there show called "friends" has been gone for a couple years now
 
clubchick said:
:eek: you gave up my secret :mad:
besides, i suspect dehawk isn't big on names anyway :zip:
and isn't joey from joey now? i think that there show called "friends" has been gone for a couple years now
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I've never watched the new show, nor do I plan to unless I become paralyzed and my batteries die in my remote.

BTW the song you refer to (which you stole the idea from me http://www.spoofee.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19427&highlight=867-5309) is a couple years, if not a decade older than Friends. ;)
 
i haven't forgotten that thread. nor have i forgiven you for spilling my number to the whole spoofee community. >:P
 
clubchick said:
i haven't forgotten that thread. nor have i forgiven you for spilling my number to the whole spoofee community. >:P
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I totally forgot about that thread, but I knew I mentioned it somewhere. :tongue: I guess my Alzheimers is improving. :confused: Sorry for lettting the cat out of the bag, clubby. ;)
 
Thanks.Just best friends.....but friends are always more than that for me cause they interpret & sometimes voice for me.

My point is, don't always believe what people say about their online 'friends'.
 
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